Filters

"Perspective is everything." That's how the old saying goes, and it's absolutely true. How you view things is all relative to your own perspective - those filters through which you process information, ideas, beliefs, and actions. This truth is most apparent in relationships. There are no two people who will look at the exact same thing in the exact same way. Everyone brings their filters with them and it translates what you perceive and what others perceive.

Your filters are there for many reasons. Your economic and professional situation. Your spiritual beliefs and values. Your life experiences – both positive and negative. These filters all come to bear in how you experience and think about life. It's as if you have a pair of glasses on that dictate your focus and clarity, or fuzzy confusion! This is most apparent when you recognize the filter of abuse and how it impacts your worldview.

You see a person who looks a particular way, has a particular mannerism or profession or gender. If he or she is at all similar to your abuser, you'll see that individual through the filter of suspicion and even fear. You discover your child is exploring his or her sexuality. What that means to you is filtered through the experience of being sexually exploited. You don't achieve the success you worked so hard for at work or at school. This is filtered through your "I'm not good enough" filter. Your partner or friend is not everything you need or want. The “abandonment’ filter translates this into a relationship-busting catastrophe.

Filters are not fixed. They can be modified or even discarded. They can be measured against how others view or experience what is so problematic for you - not in order for you to compromise or betray yourself or your beliefs - but to understand the filters of others. Filters can become balanced if you challenge them. Some of your filters are good and very appropriate. Pay attention to them, because they're not all bad and they're not always wrong. Let's face it, if you've experienced abuse or exploitation, you have an elevated awareness that others don't have. Some people need to have more of that filter - which is often so clear to you.

Like a comfortable pair of glasses that you've been looking through for years, you may not even be aware that you're wearing them. Following that metaphor, sometimes you need to take those glasses off and see what you can on your own, perhaps clean the lenses and maybe even get another pair of glasses because your vision is changing. That's all part of becoming a healthier person.

There is instruction in the New Testament Bible, 1 John 4:1 that states: "do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to SEE whether they are from God." This idea is about challenging your filters. Testing what you think, believe, and see. Recognizing that there are many different perspectives that might merit the time and effort to explore. Your filter may be right on target. It may be way off. It may be changing. These are the joys of maturing and growing healthier - when you SEE that what you SEE may need to been SEEN through a new filter. Then again, your filter may be absolutely perfect! Now, isn't that clear?

I will appear on television this week:

NavPress, the publishing arm of the Colorado Springs based U.S. Navigators, announces Sallie Culbreth, author of No Longer Alone, will appear on A Time for Hope, a weekly Faith-Based Mental Health talk and interview television show designed to help people find hope and meaning in their lives on this week. Hosted by Dr. Freida Crews, her guests offer practical solutions to real life problems and challenge millions of viewers each week to put their hope in Jesus Christ for genuine peace, healing and recovery. Check http://www.timeforhope.com/schedule.asp for local and stations.This program will also be available on Time for Hope's website for several months.